As I began to pray over what I hoped this lent season would hold for me, I thought about what the purpose of the Lenten season is. Essentially, it is an intentional time set apart for pause and reflection, for repenting from sin, and turning back to God. I wanted this to be a time where I step back and not only ask Him to bring all my sin into the light that I might look hard at it and repent, but also to really look at my life through the lens of purpose and making a difference. What does it mean for me in my life to build His kingdom? I want to spend intentional time in prayer and journaling to seek answers to the questions that I have on my heart. I also decided to undertake the Whole30 during this time. It was something on my bucket list for 2016, and I felt it was really appropriate during this time because when you give up certain things, you make more room for something else. When it comes to the Whole30, I am choosing to give up sugar, dairy, grains, and some other things, to make room for healthier foods like proteins, fruits, and veggies. I want to give myself the full thirty days to see how I feel after making these good choices, and even though it will be hard at times, I know I don't have to lean on my own strength to accomplish it. I also feel that holds true in the other areas of my life. During this Lenten season, I want to focus on giving up fear of failure or of not doing enough, fear of being too weak to make a difference, or not having enough to offer, and instead make room for the healthier perspective that HE is strong and can manifest His strength in my weakness. HE is enough and has given me everything I need to accomplish my kingdom service. I listed to a really great talk called Kingdom Matters by Paige Benton Brown, and it was so so good. I wanted to share a few of the things that she said, because this topic is where I am pressing in and asking the Lord about during Lent.
First, our purpose as the church (as in every believer), is to be in the world but not of it. We meet as a body together for spiritual refreshment and to be well-fed and then go right back into the world to DO something about what we are learning. We are to go where the Kingdom is weak and make it strong - to be the salt and light of the earth. The purpose of salt is to enhance the flavor of food, and if salt is being used appropriately, you don't even taste it, but by it you taste food better. It is the same for us - We are not to be the focus, but are to be used to help others focus on Jesus. We are not to just stay safe in our little churches and keeping being fed and getting fatter in God's grace, but rather to get stronger in it, as we go out into the world and DO.
Second, each individual is given different gifts and talents in how they are to accomplish this. Looking to the right or to the left at what He has given someone else and feeling jealous is not only sin, but it is a barrier to usefulness. Being resentful of what we don't have keeps us from using what we do have. She points out that everything is necessary that He gives you, and nothing that is necessary has been withheld from you. Your kingdom service was tailor-made for you.
Lastly, no one can else can tell you what you should be doing, you need to look to the Lord. Ask him what He wants you to do. It's not about building a nice life for your family in your neighborhood, your community, your job. It is about building His kingdom right around what is in front of you and with what he has already given you to make Him known in your neighborhood, your community, your job.
So that is where I am at, and I am asking Him to show me what He wants me to do, and asking Him to make me useful for His kingdom. I am asking Him to replace fear with love. I am not a liability, I am His daughter. I don't have to be worried that I am going to mess something up or to feel unworthy to carry His banner. He has called me as His own, every inch of my life has already been claimed by his blood, and so how can I not do anything but share His love with the world however He calls me to do it?
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